wow......

My girlfriend's mom came in town yesterday and decided that she was going to stay an extra day. Seems like a normal thing, coming from Madison and spending extra time in Chicago, doing some shit you can't do in the cheesy north. She didn't do this. She sat in my lady's condo and read all day. You stayed an extra day for this? Really?

None of this mattered to me, nothing. Until I was told I could come over for dinner. Sounds great, dinner consisted of grilled cheese and bacon from the Melrose, a corner restaurant. Now don't take this the wrong way, it's one of my favorite meals, but if my mom was there all day I'd like something homemade. Just surprises me.

Today at work I had a conversation with a guy about his marriage, how he copes with all the small things. He's been with his wife for ten years, five dating and five married and he said "As long as the big things are there the little things coast by." This was great advice, and coming from the source it's the most shocking thing that happened to me.

The gist, the little things can be annoying but the big picture is your life.....

The Stress of Being Awesome

Fucking Santas is kicking my ass this year. Seriously what is normally a typical guerilla attack on Wrigleyville of drinking and fun has ballooned into a major headache. I've had to change venues three times, deal with a function of 5000 plus people all while trying to orchestrate a 300 plus person bar crawl. It's been insanity. From now on, come hell or high water this will always take place on the weekend before Christmas.

I'm glad, totally excited actually, that we get a shitload of familiar faces for this year but this is the last time we change weekends. Putting me through the proverbial ringer, but I know this Saturday it'll all be worth it, I'm guessing we may even change the world. Probably not but I like the pompous attitude I exude when I say that knowing that I tend to be rather humble. You know what though, this is my party and I am still shocked that there may be more than 300 coming.

Most of the time I don't even understand how I have friends.

-p

Loyalty/Letdowns

I've been told that I'm loyal to a fault and sometimes I just feel like such a douche because I do things that I have no desire to do out of loyalty. Tonight I have to go to Brendan's birthday function in Wicker Park and normally I would not think twice about this but today fucking sucked. The snow caused my commute to balloon two a whopping hour and a half each way, got into it with my parent company over repair times and now I'm fucking beat.

However, that being said, I have to go to this function. My tired ass is going to throw on some clothes, wear my warmest apparel and brave the elements. Because I enjoy it? Because I want to go to a bar on a random Tuesday night? No. I am going because I hate letting people down. Brendan wants me there, so I'll go. I consider him a good friend of mine but it's literally a snowy, sleeting mess outside that is likely going to cause me to fall ill at the most inopportune time of the year.

Why do I do this? I really don't like saying no to things that are important to other people, or for that matter totally irrelevant in anyone's lives. Tonight is a prime example, I asked if it would be a big deal if I skipped tonight, the response was "severely." I really don't like letting people down. To say no is the right plan tonight, get a good night's sleep and then wake up nice and early for the office tomorrow. I won't do that, not tonight at least.

Sometimes I think I'd be happier if less people liked me. One thing that always comes from that is I really like my friends and family and having people around is a hell of a lot better than being lonely. Been to that place too......

Today

You ever walk into work feeling good and then it just takes one thing to set you right the fuck off? That happened to me today and I was surly the rest of the way. Nothing good came out of my time at the office today.

I don't know what it is for everyone, but in my case I got a boss that is a fucking lump. Always running around and seeming busy but doesn't get thing done that is productive for us. Me and this other kid picking up all the slack and dealing with the heat but where the fuck is he? To ask me to do a mundane task that he should have done days ago I have to do.

My suggestion is take it as a job and not life. I got home and was happy.